Money Monday$: Crazy Thought of the Day & What to Do Next

So I've paid off over half my debt in a year, and have $21K left to go. How long will it take me to pay it off? Well, that depends on what I do next. I am on track to pay off my car in the next 3-4 months and would love to knock out the credit card before the end of the year as well, which I think I can do. In an ideal world I would pay off the student loan and be totally debt free by the time I turn 30 at the end of the year. BUT there are a few key components to my life that need to be sorted out first...like getting a job or finding a "career" or just saying screw it and taking off on another adventure.

My BFF and I often have conversations that start with “Here was my craziest thought today….” and boy do we have a lot. Right now, the crazy thoughts in my head sounds something like this:

“You’ve just made some extra money in Oklahoma, what are you going to do? Take a trip to Costa Rica and learn how to surf, obviously! Wait, no, you should just go to the Bahamas and lie on the beach and drink fruity rum drinks! No, no, no, you are on the Ramsey get the hell out of debt plan and need to pay down on your car, then your credit card and finally your student loan. Then 6 months of living expenses and start an IRA. Oh don’t forget about life insurance somewhere in there too. Screw paying off the car, sell it! Pay off the loan, pocket the extra money and go to Costa Rica, then the Bahamas and maybe Asia! Now, now Kate, you should really settle down and get a real job, maybe find a career. You know, figure out your life. Get some actual reliable insurance and a 401K. Most of the people around you are settling down and having babies, aren’t you ever going to do the same? COSTA RICA!!! Go teach English in Thailand! Bike across Cambodia! Get a job. You made some extra money, but not THAT much. Calm the **** down, continue the 100 Day challenge and keep writing, thinking and dreaming. You’ll figure something out.  COSTA RICA!! Oooooh, didn’t you want to buy yourself a fancy new road bike?”

It’s amazing that I ever get anything done. If any of you ever wonder why I seem to change my mind/life/plans “on a whim” it is actually because I’ve been mulling it over for days, weeks or even months but haven’t verbalized it to anyone. Much of my time is spent analyzing the crazy thoughts and debating the best option for me at the time. Who? Where? What? How much will it cost? What do I have to sacrifice? What do I have to gain? What do you want to do? What should you do? Who is telling you that you should?  Who can I talk to about this? What does my BFF think? What is my ultimate goal? Do I have a goal? Will this bring me closer to all the fame and fortune that I am clearly seeking? 

Okay, that last one was a joke but most of the other questions are applied to the variety of situations I find myself in and options that I come up with.  Ultimately, I aim to make the best decision with the information I have at the time (and the money I have, or lack there of). I bought the Airstream because I was using it quite a bit while traveling for work at the time and not living in my apartment which I was paying good money for. When it turned out that I had steady work in Austin and was not on the road anymore, I sold it. Don’t get me wrong, I love the crazy thoughts that run through my mind. Many fun, interesting and good experiences have come from them, but they can be frustrating as hell to sort through to get to the good stuff.  

I’ve got an idea for the career direction I want to go in (I think, maybe, well, we'll see) but it involves some training and education, an internship or two, lots of experience and completely switching gears from the one I’ve been running on for the past three years. Film work is definitely hard, but it would be the easy thing for me to keep doing. I know film; I am comfortable with it and am confident in my abilities as an assistant production coordinator. 12 hour days? Unpredictable schedule? Random tasks? Coordinating crazy travel? Arranging meals for lots of people at different times? Dealing with a wide variety of personalities and egos? Sure, I can and will do it all but I don’t really want to any more.  It does not fulfill me. I am capable and good at my job (or so people tell me) but it is not good for me in the long run. The more film jobs I do, the further away I get from finding a career that fulfills me and allows me to fill the rest of my life with things (and people) that I love. Why would I stay in film? For the money (and the people, I do get to work with friends), but that isn't enough anymore. When I chase money, I am not chasing my dreams, even though they aren't clearly defined just yet, I know for a fact that my dream is not to work in film. So what is my dream? Question of the day my friends! I've been trying to figure it out during this 100 Day Challenge while still trying to pay down on my debts and not dip too far into my savings. On a recent day when I was particularly annoyed with my current "job" situation, I got this email from TUT (otherwise known as The Universe):

First, choose from the options that thrill you.

Then, choose the ones that also teach you.

And from these, Kate, choose the scariest.

Butterflies in your tummy are good,
    The Universe

Damn that universe! Always has something worthwhile, appropriate and timely to say. As soon as I narrow down my options I'll let you know, but in the meantime I'll be throwing all my nickels and dimes at my debt while trying to have a little fun and learn a thing or two in the process.

Peace, love and debt free dreams,
Po$$

The Copper Bar

The Copper Bar is on the top two floors of the Price Tower and also happens to be where we spent most of our free time (and per diem) while on location in Bartlesville. The bartender, Amy, was amazing and would stay open late for the crazy film crew and even had the restaurant prepare special meals for the last few of us left during our final week in town. It has the same layout as our sweet suite, but with a fully stocked (copper) bar...

downstairs tables

view from loft above

upstairs bar

specially prepared last meal

 Our final car bombs.....

Price Tower

From my last days in Oklahoma...

After 3 weeks at the Holiday Inn (which was very new, quite clean and actually nice), we moved over to the Inn at Price Tower to live in luxury for our last few nights in B'ville, OK. The Inn is a hotel inside the nineteen story Price Tower, a multi-use skyscraper designed by some guy named Frank Lloyd Wright. The tower opened in 1956, housing the corporate headquarters for the H.C. Price Company (an oil pipeline and chemical company) as well as apartments and offices for other local residents and businesses. In 2003 seven of the upper floors were converted into hotel rooms. There are 19 rooms, including a few two-story Tower Suites like the one we stayed in. The bedroom is in the loft upstairs and the living room is downstairs and you can enter from either the 11th or 12th floors. It was a pretty sweet suite...

Upstairs

The Stairs in our room

Downstairs living area

Downstairs table, looking over loft

Stairs to the loft bedroom

Huge wall of windows

view from our room

 

Smallest, oddest shaped elevator ever

Weekly Adventures: Pathfinder Parkway

Here in B'ville, there is an awesome 10+ mile trail that runs through the town alongside a creek - the Pathfinder Parkway. I posted briefly about it before, but only with pictures of the inspirational message mile markers. Here are some more pics from my long weekend runs over the past few weeks, some days were obviously sunnier and prettier than others. The parkway trail is my favorite part of this town, it is paved, well kept and quite pretty (though I bet it is even better in the spring when everything is actually green again). My only complaint is there could be a few more mile markers and/or signs so people (who shall remain nameless) don't end up running through a trailer park on the wrong side of the tracks trying to find the other leg of the "dog leg" trail.

You Are Here

Old car in a creek bed

Tunnel under road

Greetings from Oklahoma

I am still  here in northern Oklahoma, working my last week and not having much time for "writing" between working, reading, sweating and hanging out with some of the most awesome and hilarious crew members this side and that side of the Red River. So instead, here is first round of pictures from OK....

 

Red River

Crossing the Red River

Welcome sign at the local car rental place

Downtown Tulsa

Night out in Tulsa

Crystal Pistol - Tulsa

Deep in thought....or wine

I'm Not Mad...Just Disappointed

I had a bad day yesterday, it was totally avoidable and totally my fault. I did not do my 100 minutes, nor did I really do my 100 pages. I had a gnarly hangover, like top 5 worst I've ever had. Ugh, I know it is a terrible excuse. You would think I would learn by now and there is no reason for it other than my own bad judgment and misbehavior. I didn't do anything too stupid on Sunday night, other than drink too much and dance (and leave my car downtown, for which I got two $15 parking tickets). A bad 6th day of work combined with the entire crew arriving and having a big reunion (they all worked here together for 3 months last year), no dinner, a bar opening just for us and me getting to know everyone over car bombs (Baileys & Jameson dropped into a half pint of Guiness) and fruity rum drinks = Kate couldn't hold anything down, nor get out of bed until approximately 5pm yesterday. I couldn't even read because my head hurt so damn bad. Ugh. Embarrassing and pissed me off because I wasted a good day off because I was wasted the night before. It was a fun night, but so not worth the pain, misery and not completing my 100s for the first time this challenge.  Because The Universe seems to always have something appropriate to say, this was in my inbox yesterday (which I failed to read until today):

Low days exist to remind you that you still have choices.

High days, Kate, exist to remind you of how fast you rebound... among other things.

Boing,
    The Universe

As I am kicking myself today, I am also reminding myself to not let one bad day turn into two, so tonight I will be rebounding on the bike or treadmill at the hotel gym, furiously reading 200 pages while sweating any remaining alcohol out of my system. If I never see a car bomb again, it will be too soon. 

Money Monday$: What Will You Do For Money?

Driving through central Oklahoma

I didn't post last Money Monday$ because it was Valentine's Day, and pictures are way prettier and more fun than money, most of the time. This Monday I am posting super late because I spent the better part of today driving 600 miles to northern Oklahoma for work. As I mentioned in my last post, I wasn't exactly planning working on a film during this 100 Days Challenge, since I knew of nothing on the horizon and I am looking for alternative forms employment, or maybe even a "career." But this short job popped up and my savings account did a little happy dance when it starting thinking that it didn't have to support me all by itself for a little while.  So here I am in a delightful hotel overlooking a small town mall with a Dillard's AND a Sears and will be slaving away 12-14 hours a day for the next 25 days.

It could be worse; there is free internet, free breakfast and a little gym at the hotel! Not to mention I am working with one of my good friends and it is an interesting film project that will be cool to be a part of. I do have a special place in my heart for random small towns and cross country road trips so a month in Oklahoma is a little adventure for me. But the real reason I took this job is for the money, which is pretty much the reason I have spent most of my working years in film so far. It pays me, sometimes well, sometimes not at all, but either way I have managed to make a living doing it for six years. Even though I bitch and complain about film jobs more often than not, I just can't say no to a paying job. Crazy right? Who would turn down paying work? But I am walking a fine line between paying down my debts, saving up money for a career/life change and working positively towards that change while trying to put my health/happiness first, before jobs and before money. So why am I at a hotel in Nowhere, OK? Because I see it as an additional stepping stone to my next move. I can save more money and buy myself a little more time so I can do a thorough and conscious evaluation of my next move, without having too many money induced panic attacks in the process.

It is a compromise, as I would much rather be back in NB doing "nothing" but focusing on the 100 Days, but I don't live in a total fantasy land (yet) and do feel like I "need" to be working if the opportunity presents itself. Something about feeling productive, making a living, contributing to society, blah blah blah.  Hopefully someday sooner rather than later, I will be in a financial position where I don't have to make compromises and sacrifices for money. In the meantime, I will be working my 100 Days off as a temporary Okie.

What sacrifices and compromises have you made for money?

Never Say Never

There has been a slight change in my plans. I am going to Oklahoma on Monday for one month to work on some re-shoots for film. This wasn't exactly in my plans for the 100 Day Challenge, but after crunching some numbers I decided it might be in my best interest to actually make some money for a month while I continue to weigh my options for my next "career" step. It also helps that I'll be in OK with one of my very good and fun friends, who I spent the summer of 2009 with on working another film in that same state north of the Red River. 

I haven't said too much about it on here yet, but I think I am narrowing down what career direction I want to go in that does not involve film. I've been researching and doing info interviews and am excited about this possibly new direction. I don't want to go into it "publicly" yet, as I have a tendency to change my mind and plans every 5 minutes so until I have an actual, real plan, the details and subject will remain vague. I am pretty sure my inconsistencies and mind-changing ways are in the Poss genes as my dad's quote to me the other night when I told him I was taking the job in OK after swearing off film was something along the lines of "good God, you really are my daughter." Either that or they finally got the paternity tests back that confirm I am not the milk man's, though I'm still hoping I am Oprah's long lost daughter.

No matter what, I will continue the 100 day challenge, getting in my exercise and pages before or after the inevitable 12+ hour days that lie ahead for the next 30 days. There is a small fitness center at the hotel and I can always bring running shoes to walk or run outside. If I have to, I'll even do calisthenics in the production office in between phone calls and emails. I will bring many books and will have to make myself read, even if I am tired. There will be no Lunchboxes for me, a delightful local drink made of beer, orange juice and Amaretto that will inevitability lead me to dance with a toothless local until the wee hours of the morning while my books sit at the hotel, lonely and untouched.

During one of my info interviews this week with a self employed small business owner, I heard an appropriate quote. "It is not the original commitment you make, it is the re-commitment you make to it every single day." Damn, so appropriate. I committed to the 100 Day Challenge back in early January, when I didn't have another job on the horizon. I must now make a much more conscious re-commitment to it, every single day once I get to Oklahoma.  It will now be much more challenging to put myself and this challenge first while working a demanding job on another, and possibly my last, film.  I know I won't lose any friends or family if I miss a day or slack off here and there because I was at the office from 8A to 11P, but I will be sad/mad/disappointed in myself if I let that happen. This challenge is as much about the discipline to do something good for myself EVERY SINGLE DAY NO MATTER WHAT as it is about hitting the 100 minutes and 100 pages marks daily. Speaking of, there is a stationary bike and a book calling my name...